Bitchiness

This month is ending on a lot of sour notes, so excuse me while I vent. Being mentally tired is just as exhausting as being physically tired, sometimes even moreso.
Everytime I see him my whole demeanor changes. I get mad N depressed at the same time. I can honestly say I despise him with all my heart. It makes me sick to my stomach to know that you'd claim someone elses child but would B so quick to deny your own. N I wonder, maybe too much sometimes, what couldve been if everything had turned out as it shouldve. Next month wouldve been 3 months... Doesn't help that many of the things he used to do, she does. Irritates me to no end. But alas, its my fate.
My damn neighbors called the cops on my little sisters N my baby girl today, what stupid bitch goes out of her way to fuck with children?? She's gotten underneath my skin to the point that I knocked on her door N had a few choice words to say before she slammed the door like a coward. In as many apartments that we've lived in from FL to CA we've never had a problem with neighbors, EVER. So why now?? Cause she's a racist fat ass with too much damn time on her hands. Its fine though, first thing tomorrow I'm goin to the leasing office on that ass. She's got my mama stressin out about this, N its all pettiness.
I'm just so over everybody right now. Nothing is going right N I feel myself not holding back my anger. Hopefully things will look up soon. Like the much deserved raise I finally got at work, its good to know SOMEONE notices what I'm bringing to the table, not too much of that happening these days...